Let's talk about baths for a minute

(a photograph of the most sanitary bath in history)

Let's be real for a minute: baths are fucking disgusting. There is absolutely no excuse in the 21st Century to consider marinating in a puddle of your own filth to be a reasonable means of sanitation. Our grandparents didn't pack themselves like sardines into ramshackle boats and sail across an ocean (or climb over fences and run from whackjob rednecks with shotguns and Dale Earnhardt t-shirts) to get to this country so that we could shun running water and proper hygiene.

What kind of person comes home from a long day of work covered in sweat and decides that rather than stand over a drain and conveniently be sprayed with hot water, they would prefer to lay around in filthy water like fucking hippopotami?

Furthermore, some claim that by burning incense or candles or by adding some ridiculous Gypsy salts to your bathwater, one can achieve an unparalleled level of relaxation. Anyone who tells you that watches Oprah, and any man who says that almost certainly loves the cock.

Now on the other hand, if you can find baths that look like this, by all means partake:



SJGR.