I think I might get a tattoo after all.

SJGR

I forgot...you did too

September 11, 2001. That date is probably something none of us will ever be able to escape. It is the day that most of us felt like our security and safety had been taken away. I remember being in my 8th grade classroom watching the events unfold on CNN. There is no doubt that it was absolutely horrifying and crushing for us as Americans.

While I agree that it was a day marked by bloodshed and innocent deaths, I also believe that some of us deal with it differently. I, like most of the people I know, have a sick sense of humor. I find certain things funny that could be considered "tasteless". I don't believe in openly mocking those that are directly affected by tragedy, but if I want to make a joke or two, I'm going to.

Some of us need to to get off our high horse, and stop pretending like were above making jokes at the expense of national tragedies. Stop being so sensitive. Chances are that half of the people who decide to speak out against these jokes were in no way directly affected or involved by the events of that day. The world is a sick place, get used to it. We find it funny to make 9/11 jokes. Hell, why can we make Pearl Harbor jokes, but not 9/11??

Bottomline: The world will continue to spin, and we will continue to make jokes.

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SJGR

Let's talk about baths for a minute

(a photograph of the most sanitary bath in history)

Let's be real for a minute: baths are fucking disgusting. There is absolutely no excuse in the 21st Century to consider marinating in a puddle of your own filth to be a reasonable means of sanitation. Our grandparents didn't pack themselves like sardines into ramshackle boats and sail across an ocean (or climb over fences and run from whackjob rednecks with shotguns and Dale Earnhardt t-shirts) to get to this country so that we could shun running water and proper hygiene.

What kind of person comes home from a long day of work covered in sweat and decides that rather than stand over a drain and conveniently be sprayed with hot water, they would prefer to lay around in filthy water like fucking hippopotami?

Furthermore, some claim that by burning incense or candles or by adding some ridiculous Gypsy salts to your bathwater, one can achieve an unparalleled level of relaxation. Anyone who tells you that watches Oprah, and any man who says that almost certainly loves the cock.

Now on the other hand, if you can find baths that look like this, by all means partake:



SJGR.

This Shit is 2 REAL

In a world that is sugar-coated and sprinkled with white lies, we have created the first official SJGR blog in an effort to lift the veil placed upon your eyes. Was that a run-on sentence? I'm sure it was, but this shit is too real to fit into your idea of proper grammar. Too real indeed.

Around here, you won't hear the words "Don't get it twisted". You know why? We don't get it twisted. In fact, we untwist it and set that bitch straight. Real Talk is more than an expression to us, it is the way of life. Real Talk is a declaration. On to the realness...

Johnnie's Beef


I have lived in Chicago since I was born. This is the only city I know. Of all this time spent in Chicago, I have lived in Elmwood Park for approximately 14 years. I can recall that for as long as I have lived here, Johnnie's Beef has always been praised for its amazing food. Specifically their Italian Beef sandwiches and their Italian Ice. This place is regarded as one of the best in Chicago and has gained legendary status with hundreds of reviews and even TV time.

People live for this place. I have seen the legendary lines during lunch hour. The very same that stretch across the building during the summer. If you are white and live in Elmwood Park, chances are that you love Johnnie's. So throughout the years, I would always hear about this place, but never once tried it. I felt like I was above the hype and no way could this place be that good. I just never 'got it'.

So, after more than a decade of living in Elmwood Park, I went against my better judgment and ate at Johnnie's. I had one of their Italian Beefs, but luckily I didn't have to wait in their ridiculous line. You know what? Not impressed. Not in the least bit. I've had better Italian Beef sandwiches in other states.

Chances are that if you love Johnnie's Beef, you are :
A) White
B)Italian
C)A fuckin Mamaluke

Shit Just Got Real.